Welcome to Alaska!

For some reason the locals think this is a really funny thing to say & the first few times you hear it you try to convince your self they're saying something else. Just a bit funny :)

Question. Why are my ex & his girlfriend always the first people to check out the photos on my trip page? When you look at the photos you have to log in & it keeps a list of who's looked at the photos the date & time etc. It slightly freaks me out that they are so concerned with what I'm doing... And at the same time I'm kinda wondering what my ex thinks when he checks out the photos & sees me having fun. I just think its strange that's all.

I went for a massage this afternoon. It was great, I really miss them. My shoulder started to twinge again this morning - think I've been pushing things to hard, this tours been pretty full on (which I love) but my body doesn't seem to like it . Nathan, the guy who gave me the massage said my shoulder still wasn't right & was surprised that I wasn't referred to a chiropractor because the joints in my shoulder aren't right, still, & that I have lost muscle in some places & gained it in others to compensate. He managed to put it back in a little but couldn't fix it completely. It's feeling heaps looser.

Just been out for a few drinks & I'm happy to report that I can now, once again, handle my alcohol. I went off Doxy the other day. There's just to much sun here to try & keep out of it. You're supposed to be on it 4 weeks after you leave Malaria affected areas, I gave it 3 & have given Helen instructions to take care of me & get me to a hospital if I come down with anything.

Need to go to sleep, have a early start tomorrow, we're setting off for Jordan.

Nite.

Dahab - Egypt, Wednesday, 25th August 2004, 12.30am

No more Braids...

It took about 2 hours to get the braids out & cost me 20le for 2 little girls to help Helen & I take them out. After 6 weeks my hair was starting to matt & they were starting to grow out :( I miss them already but its all good. I hate my hair so will just have to go back to bandanas. Shopping tomorrow!!! :o)

I'm so tired but just felt like writing. Last night we climbed Mt Sinai. We traveled the 9 hours form Cairo to Dahab yesterday, chilled out & had dinner then at 10.30pm set off for the mountain. At 1.30am I was atop a camel winding my way up looking at the stars. Did you know that the saucepan is on its side here. It was really cool. We watched the sun rise & set off back down the mountain. In 48hours I'd had 2 hours sleep & climbed a mountain (well half, the camel can't take you all the way to the top) quite impressive me thinks, hehehe.

I'm really enjoying this trip & are feeling really happy again which feels great. I love it that there are only 5 people on this leg of the tour & the I get on with them really well.

Well, it's after10.30& I'm finding it hard to keep my eyes open.

Night.

Dahab - Egypt, Monday, 23rd August 2004, 10.40pm

Feelin Good.

There's so much that has happened that I haven't written here so it really sucks to try & get everything up to speed...

I'm sure I haven't mentioned the incident that I'm about to write about, basically it's taken me the last 8 weeks to be able to think of it & not cringe... I would class it as the most embarrassing moment of my life - when I think of embarrassment nothing else really comes to mind :o)

So the question is where do I start. I spose at the beginning...

In Portugal I was shearing a room with 2 really cool girls, Net & Bec, pretty sure I wrote about them on my trip page. We got on really well & the first night we went out together, a guy they'd met (who we'll call E, for embarrassment), also came with us. Before we went out I was teasing Net that something was going on with this guy but both of them were like no, no etc. Anyway the night progressed Bec was tired so went back to the hostel & the 3 of us went out to Barrio Alto. We met up with some Italian guys form the hostel & Net was talking to them all night so E & I chatted away about all sorts of stuff & really hit it off. Along with getting really really drunk... To make things worse one of the conversations we'd had was that you can tell when a guy or girl is interested in each other etc along with the 'it's always nice when a girl makes the first move...' At one stage during the night I said to Net that he's really nice etc & she's like go for it blah, blah, blah. So here comes the embarrassing part... We decided to call it a night & went back to the hostel & E was going to go back to his hotel, Net said bye & went in side & I stayed out side & thought I'd give him a good night kiss... He didn't really respond or say anything etc & I was a tad drunk so didn't really notice... Then Net popped her head back out & we decided to go to a club that was pumping music across the road & I stopped drinking. When we decided to call it a night again, same thing happened. I kissed him again this time realized there wasn't really any response & wanted the ground to swallow me whole. Next day I find out that there was actually something between Net & E & neither of them bothered to mention it to me!!!! I have never, ever, been so embarrassed in my entire life or felt like such a utter total reject.

Anyway now the plot thickens, just as I was coming to grips with it all... Yesterday morning on the Flucca I checked my phone & I had a txt message there. It was form E! I was just a tad surprised! He was one of the last people I'd thought I'd hear form. Anyway he was asking me how I was & how I was enjoying my trip & if it was September that I'd be in the UK, ending with a "speak to you soon". Talk about freaking me out. I wasn't going to respond but thought what the hell. So did a 'hey, didn't expect to hear form you' thing, followed by a 'sorry for misreading that whole situation, I was so embarrassed when I woke up! Trips great etc & that I get to the UK in Oct'. Anyway he responded something along the lines of 'no need to apologise - long story that I'll explain to you when you get here if you'd like to catch up for a drink.'

Now there is a point to me shearing my embarrassment. 1) to get it off my chest 2) because I didn't realise how much this whole thing had upset me & 3) now I don't feel like so much of a reject.

I've learned I don't cope well with rejection to well, surprise, surprise. I thought I was happy enough been me with out really caring what other people thought & like I said every time I've thought about this over the last 8 or so weeks I've cringed, shaken my head & wanted the ground to swallow me whole. I thought that I'd relaxed so much since I've been traveling & I spose in a lot of respects I have but I'm still way to harsh on myself. The whole incident really knocked my self esteem as well & I think I got a bit down. Don't think I've ever really felt that rejected before, well apart form Steve but that's a whole different story.

I'm loading photos at the moment & have to update my trip page. It's been good to get all that off my chest :)

Cairo - Egypt, Sunday, 21st August 2004, 4.55pm

I'm kinda not in a rush!

How cool is that! I'm on a tour but have a bit of free time! I even get to wake myself up in the mornings & are a active participant in deciding in what we're going to eat. :o)

I'm so much happier than I was in Africa. I honestly couldn't wait for that tour to be over! There are some really cool people on this tour too & everyone's pretty easy going. Most people are form Oz or NZ, I think it makes a difference - like they actually get my humor! No appealing guys unfortunately though :( It's been soooooo long since I've had any action I'm contemplating just walking up to some guy & just saying lets go - its been over 2 months! I did get offers in Nairobi but ummm, I'm really not all that desperate I discovered. In Africa the whole Aids thing freaked me out. On the water bottles they even have warnings about safe sex! Spose I'll just have to wait & see what the weeks ahead bring.

Well better head back to the hotel, oh & I might have a shower, funny the things you get excited about! My priorities have certainly changed, top 3 -

Number 1: Bed, with mattress & pillow.
Number 2: Toilet with running water.
Number 3: Shower (hot water is good but not necessary, I've discovered I can go 4 days with out a shower & still be happy. This coming from a girl that HAD to shower every morning & have a full face of make up before she left the house!)

Funny thing is I can do with out all of them now. Oh & another exciting news flash. For the last 5 or so weeks I haven't been wearing foundation! How scary is that. I pretty much don't give a shit anymore & I kinda like it that way too :) Don't worry, I'm all talk, as soon as I get back into a city I'll be back to my high maintance self, hehehe

Well should get back to the hotel before dark. Hope you're all good. love you soo much it's not funny, been in Africa made me realise just how much!

Luxor, Egypt - Wednesday 11 August 2004, 7pm