What's with the eyes?!
OK, I've never been much of a cryer & it usually takes a lot to get me going BUT now if I'm watching a movie or reading a book & something's a tiny bit sad, or happy for that matter, the eyes start to get a little dewy. What the hell's with that. I can honestly say I don't understand it. I much prefer been the cold heartless cow I've always been.... go figure. I didn't even cry at my own wedding for god's sake & now I watch a movie.... maybe I've just got eye problems!
I had a great weekend. Busy but good, I love catching up with great company.
I'm doing my freak out act again tho... so much to do, so little time. Oh, plus the thought of getting raped & murdered whilst over seas has slipped in to my thinking somehow... Everyone is so full of good intentions, even people I don't know, telling me every single horrible story they've ever heard about people travelling. I'm not stupid for gods sake I do realise some of the places I'm going to aren't particularly safe but then I'm going to try my dam best not to get my liver or kidneys cut out aren't I. One of mums friends told her to tell me to dye my hair brown... what if I like my hair blond? I spose there's wanted & unwanted attention, huh? I'm going to take some of those semi permanent dye sachet things with me so I'll see how it goes.
In between cleaning out mums garage yesterday in preparations for the garage sale next weekend, mum took me to drop off the kitchen tea invites I'd made for my friend. On the way we were talking & she's like I'm really, really going to miss you blah, blah, blah & then she starts to cry a little. Talk about tugging at the heart strings. Am I abandoning everyone.... am I doing the right thing here... I'm feeling a little bit lost & overwhelmed at the moment... I've always wanted to travel, but it all just seems hard & scary at the moment.
I walked out of my apartment this morning & while I was waiting for the lift I looked in the mirror & was like, this is one of my favourite outfits - black pants, white shirt, cool vest thingy & tan pointy boots, but do you think I can take any of these clothes with me on my trip? That would be NO. It's not really that big a problem but lots of things are really starting to sink in. I've been trying to prepare myself all the way along but the things I've been telling myself are finally real. I was sitting in my apartment last night looking around. Um yep, in 2 & a half weeks I'm not going to have anything left there, it'll all be in storage. My god, am I really going to be able to live out of a back pack? Leaving my family... leaving my friends... leaving my wardrobe ;) Did I mention that when I cleaned out my clothes I had 3 garbage bags, another huge bag & one huge box of shoes... you can still open my wardrobe & it looks decent too - scary!
For the first time I'm really wondering if I'm actually going to be able to do this... I've done no work this morning. I'm to in my head... does that make sense? It's not that I don't want to do work it's just that I can't switch off all the other stuff... I feel like crying. GOD I HATE BEEN ALL EMOTIONAL!!! I sound like such a whimp & one of those needy, cryie girls that you just want to slap round the head & tell to get over it & move on... Maybe it's just cause it's that time of the month. That can usually be blamed for any type of mood or attitude... good excuse me thinks! ;o)
I had a great weekend. Busy but good, I love catching up with great company.
I'm doing my freak out act again tho... so much to do, so little time. Oh, plus the thought of getting raped & murdered whilst over seas has slipped in to my thinking somehow... Everyone is so full of good intentions, even people I don't know, telling me every single horrible story they've ever heard about people travelling. I'm not stupid for gods sake I do realise some of the places I'm going to aren't particularly safe but then I'm going to try my dam best not to get my liver or kidneys cut out aren't I. One of mums friends told her to tell me to dye my hair brown... what if I like my hair blond? I spose there's wanted & unwanted attention, huh? I'm going to take some of those semi permanent dye sachet things with me so I'll see how it goes.
In between cleaning out mums garage yesterday in preparations for the garage sale next weekend, mum took me to drop off the kitchen tea invites I'd made for my friend. On the way we were talking & she's like I'm really, really going to miss you blah, blah, blah & then she starts to cry a little. Talk about tugging at the heart strings. Am I abandoning everyone.... am I doing the right thing here... I'm feeling a little bit lost & overwhelmed at the moment... I've always wanted to travel, but it all just seems hard & scary at the moment.
I walked out of my apartment this morning & while I was waiting for the lift I looked in the mirror & was like, this is one of my favourite outfits - black pants, white shirt, cool vest thingy & tan pointy boots, but do you think I can take any of these clothes with me on my trip? That would be NO. It's not really that big a problem but lots of things are really starting to sink in. I've been trying to prepare myself all the way along but the things I've been telling myself are finally real. I was sitting in my apartment last night looking around. Um yep, in 2 & a half weeks I'm not going to have anything left there, it'll all be in storage. My god, am I really going to be able to live out of a back pack? Leaving my family... leaving my friends... leaving my wardrobe ;) Did I mention that when I cleaned out my clothes I had 3 garbage bags, another huge bag & one huge box of shoes... you can still open my wardrobe & it looks decent too - scary!
For the first time I'm really wondering if I'm actually going to be able to do this... I've done no work this morning. I'm to in my head... does that make sense? It's not that I don't want to do work it's just that I can't switch off all the other stuff... I feel like crying. GOD I HATE BEEN ALL EMOTIONAL!!! I sound like such a whimp & one of those needy, cryie girls that you just want to slap round the head & tell to get over it & move on... Maybe it's just cause it's that time of the month. That can usually be blamed for any type of mood or attitude... good excuse me thinks! ;o)
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